Breaking free from 'stuck'

Namrata Arora is a talent strategist and works with many women as a life coach and guide

Namrata Arora | OCTOBER 06, 2012, 08:35 AM IST

So many times, we find ourselves saying that we cannot helpour situation because we believe that we are really stuck. We might findourselves stuck in the wrong relationship or the wrong job or the wrong house.Despite what we go through everyday, we choose to remain stuck. That’s right -we are stuck by choice – well, in most cases, we know that is true. We mightchoose to remain stuck because we believe any change might upset our life’sbalance, render a few people unhappy, unsettle a few minds and what not. So, wedecide to become the sacrificial lamb instead and drown ourselves in self-pityevery day for many days, months, even years. The result is often something thatwe might not want to admit or know about. Nervous breakdowns, depressions, lackof self-worth and a lack of desire to live in general are red flags for us totake action.

I know of a friend who believes her health is going down thedrain as she is stuck in a very stressful job, unhappy with her situation athome and believes her kids are getting impacted too. Nobody would really choosesuch an unhappy situation. Perhaps what seems ‘more’ important to her is thedesire to earn more money and to sustain a ‘socially acceptable’ lifestyle.That is really where the key lies – in prioritising our needs and wants. Sooften, we let our ‘perceived needs’ govern the course of our lives. Often, wedo this at the cost of our qualitative wants and desires. We let go of thatwalk in the morning for the new job because it pays us more money; we forgethow we used to love reading books because we are too busy at work and no longerpermit ourselves the time to do what truly brings us joy.

Many of us find ourselves caught in the quagmire of what wereally want but believe we cannot have, as just we cannot let go of the comfortof our present.

We spend far too much time thinking about how sad our situationis and how we wish something better might happen but we don’t really spend muchtime working out alternatives to get ourselves ‘unstuck’. The truth is,sometimes, we prefer the sadness of being ‘stuck’ than the likely happinessthat a changed situation might present to us. More often than not, miracleshappen to those who work towards making them happen, every single day.

The last time you felt ‘stuck’, how strong was your desireto be unstuck? How many options did you generate to get ‘unstuck’? Did you stopafter your first try? Did you believe that a miracle might happen simply bywaiting for it or did you work towards being ‘unstuck’, relentlessly?

As they say, if we want something real bad, the universeconspires to bring it to us. The point is, are we ready for it? Are you readyfor being ‘unstuck’?

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